Dale was my boyfriend in the 10th grade. I met him at school, and we had instant, mutual attraction.
After our first date or two, he came over to meet my mother. He sat next to me on the sofa with my mom in an armchair. He was so nice and conversational that he totally won her over. And I was feeling like a very lucky girl.
He told Mother all about his brother who had been in Vietnam and was basically a hero. He told her about his dad who was an executive with Playtex which produced one of the most popular bra brands in the entire United States.
He was in a rock band with three other guys in Newnan, Georgia, which is where they had lived before moving to Douglasville. He was very good looking, smart, funny, and really sweet. In the band, he was lead singer and lead guitar player.
I would go over to his house when they had band practice when his dad would come down to watch for a while with a beer in his hand an easy going charm.
It was truly a totalculture shock for me because that was a BIG No-No in my home. But his dad had absolutely no shame and acted like it was completely normal. (My reaction was telling on my sheltered upbringing.)
One day while attending a practice session, I went upstairs because his mom was making sandwiches for lunch, and I thought it would be polite to offer help.
I was standing next to her at the sink doing something to help, and I innocently asked if Dale’s brother was at home. She stopped working and looked at me with an expression I couldn’t read and said, “Dale doesn’t have a brother.”
As an adult I understood that she understood where I had gotten that information, but she just dropped it not saying anything further. I was surprised but didn’t ask any more questions.
Over the few weeks, Dale and I became so close that we talked about running away and getting married. He was the first boy who really made me think I had fallen in love.
I also learned he wouldn’t offer me a beer because his dad counted them to make sure he wasn’t tempted to sneak one or two occasionally. I wouldn’t have taken one if he had offered, so of course it wasn’t a big deal to me. But this was just more proof of our family differences.
For the record, I learned very early in our relationship that he was actually very timid and not like most guys who would try to take liberties. He just wasn’t like that. I felt like he respected me, and I trusted him. I thought we had a great relationship.
His family included me in a lot of things they did as a family. For example, I was invited to ride with his mom and dad to Newnan where he and his bandmates were going to be in a contest for their talent. It was so much fun, and I really felt that I had seen a side of life that I really never even knew existed.
I would go with him to his out of town friends’ houses where, sometimes, they would have band practice. They always treated me well and accepted me as part of the group.
Then, a couple of weeks later, Daddy told me I couldn’t see Dale anymore. He demanded I break up with him. He didn’t want to hear anything else about it. Case closed. I was upset, but it was not a situation where I would defy Daddy.
I was a good kid and, even though I was like most teenagers, it was only on the smallest things that I would go against what Daddy said.
Years later, I found out why Daddy made me break up with Dale:
One night, a good friend who lived in Villa Rica called. Danny George, who I’d known my entire life and am still friends with to this day was my friend and never my boyfriend. He invited me to join him and some of our other friends just to hang out. Go to the Dairy Queen. Drive around. Meet up with others in the city park just to drink Cokes and talk.
I learned that Daddy was waiting for us to get home because he just wanted to say, “Hey!” to my friends. Once he thought he heard us drive up and, looking out the window, he saw something that creeped him out so badly he made his decision right then he was going to forbid me to ever see Dale again after school.
He saw Dale’s car parked across the street with his lights off. Daddy realized he was spying on me, and in his mind, that was dangerous behavior.
I was upset that he forced me to break up with Dale, but I survived and moved on.
After Daddy told me why he actually did what he did, I was stunned. I had no idea that Dale was like that.
I don’t know if I ever talked to Daddy about it again, but I hope I told him how much I appreciated him for things just like that when he had done what he felt was right to protect me.
Dale? His dad was located to another city, and I have no idea what happened to him, but I did learn that his daddy did not work at Playtex. He was an executive but it was at some latex company. Dale just thought it sounded cool for him to work at an underwear company so he added the “P”.
Daddy had figured out that he was a pathological liar which was its own kind of danger.
And one more note, to protect people, this is not my high school boyfriend’s real name.
Okay one final note: I didn’t realize until I was an adult that Daddy knew everything that went on with me and practically every kid at high school. Being a barber, some of his customers were my classmates and their dads.
I’d never thought about that until I was an adult. I was just always astounded at how in the know he was about everything. 🤣
One more note for myself so I won’t forget: when I was dating Dale, Avon was popular. When he and his buddies were trying to figure out a name for their band, one of the guys saw his mom’s open Avon booklet, and he told the guys he had the perfect name. He’d gotten it from one of the Avon products: the band was officially dubbed “Lime Velvet”.
